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Emotional Boston Sports Fan Calls into 680 The Fan
Buster Miller appears on The Front Row (680 The Fan, ATL)
A Real Thing That Someone Said To Me
I S T A Y F A D E D
THEORY: Kanye West thinks that the mall is the epitome of class.
I think that because: he says so.
In this year’s single “All Day,” West boasted that everything in his entire existence is motivated by performing activities for an entire day.
ACTUAL LYRICS:
How long you n!gg@s ball? All day, n!gg@…
How much time you spent at the mall? All day, n!gg@…
PROOF: If given his druthers Kanye West would spend entire days at The Mall.
In his duet with Jay-Z “N!gg@s in Paris” (Watch the Throne), Kanye bleats out:
She said, “‘Ye, can we get married at the malllllllllllllllllllllllll?”
… Come and meet me in the bathroom stalll
and show me why you deserve to have it alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll!
*In this lyric, “hav(ing) it all” = getting married at The Mall.
PROOF: Kanye West thinks a woman’s dream is to get married at The Mall.
Kanye’s not the only one.
In “Wesley’s Theory” Kendrick Lamar ponders the big questions – asking:
What you want? You a house or a car?
Forty acres and a mule, a piano, a guitar?
…
Motherfucker, you can live at the mall
Forty acres and a mule, a piano, a guitar?
…
Motherfucker, you can live at the mall
Here, Lamar considers prizes and gifts and dreams of the day he could live at The Mall.
E-40 and Too Short Tip Their Hat to All-Day Mall-ery
SONG: “Rapper’s Ball”
Say that you got it all, love the way you players ball
Everyday you’re at the mall, tell me is it true or false?
These two aren’t even sure if said players are actually at the mall everyday.
And they search still for confirmation: tell me if it’s true or false Too Short cries out!
Wait, but the shirt you’re wearing is for YOUR band!
- Yeah but what I’m saying is that YOU’RE IN Metallica… and you’re wearing a Metallica shirt. See what I mean?
CHECK BACK WITH US FOR THE LEAK!!!… METALLICA DISS TRACK VERSUS SLAYER … SAYS THEY DON’T WRITE THEIR OWN SOLOS… SLAYER TAKES TO TWITTER TO TALK SHIT … AND YOU’LL NEVER GUESS HOW THEIR WIVES REACTED… DRAMA SMDH!!
REMEMBER THE 90’S FEMALE RAPPER LADY D? WELL, BITCH GAINED SOME WEIGHT THIS SUMMER… SHE GOT HELLA FAT NOW SHE TALKIN ABOUT ‘I HAVE A THYROID ISSUE’ … BIH PLEASE, YOUR THYROID HAS DIABETES…SMDH!!
I Am The Tumblr: It’s STILL funny when people fall
I’m writing this to tell you about something called Internet Karma.
To start with you have to know that I’ve been posting photos and GIFs of people falling and hurting themselves onto a Tumblr page because it’s a really fun thing to do.
My interest in Falling Humor really started back in high school, where me and my buddies spent about 70% of the time laughing… very loudly. Screeching, running, dancing and pointing. At people. We really laughed when someone fell. I don’t laugh explosively too much anymore, because being a grown-up is full of sadness.
I wish I did laugh like that. And why did I stop laughing just because I graduated from high school?
So I created a Tumblr account to try and re-capture that joy.
I posted a GIF of a kid on a unicycle who falls face-first into a pile of dung; a mother pouring Wal-Mart canola oil onto the floor of her kitchen, sending her son flying into the front of the oven, smashing the glass. Multiple escalator-falls.
One of the most popular entries depicts a young lady falling face-first into a rock-hard beach after dropping from a rope swing.
And so it was a couple of Sundays ago that I sat with a friend and watched her fall over and over, looping and looping infinitely. He turned to me and said
“It’s only a matter of time till YOU fall.
You’re going to hurt yourself because of this website.
It’s Internet Karma.”
Cut to: A few hours later. A lakefront. Afternoon.
While going off the rope swing, I tore my pectoral muscle and it hurt like a bastard.
- That’s blood that drained out of my chest into my arm. I deserved it, I DESERVED IT!!
The first thing I did was put ice on it and cry a little in the bathroom but after that I put a notice on the Tumblr page announcing the incident and the end of the campaign.
It was the right thing to do.
THIS SITE IS SHUT DOWN FOR REASONS OF KARMA says the headline.
Please learn from my mistake and stay positive when you’re online. Laughing is fun, but only when it’s directed at other people.
Let’s keep it clean out there.
LOVE, WILL
Decision Final on OutKast Addition to Stone Mtn – Now What?
So it’s final – the Internet has spoken and we’ve decided that “there’s plenty of room” and we’re adding OutKast to the side of Stone Mountain.
(If you turned on a computer yesterday you know that artist Mack Williams’ proposal to add the hip-hop rap duo to the side of the mountain easily reached and surpassed every goal set on its MoveOn petition page).
Phase one complete!
Next we’ve got to figure out who will do the carving.
Faulkner works on the monument. (PHOTO: Gwinnett Daily Post)
Potential Candidates:
- Roy Faulkner. When the current carving was completed in 1972 it was Faulkner who was the crew foreman. Faulkner does not have a Facebook account, therefore he has been difficult to contact. He lives in Snellville today.
- Gutzon Borglum. It was Borglum’s sketches that led to the original carvings done in 1923. Utilizing Borglum’s talents might quiet any rumblings from the status quo and could even appease “the old.”
**UPDATE: Borglum died 74 years ago, so he’s a definite “no.”
- Stan Mullins. Mullins is a Georgia-native and Athens resident who is a world-renown sculptor. You can see his statue of legendary Georgia coach Vince Dooley on Lumpkin Street in Athens next to the UGA Track.
- OUR CHOICE: Mack Williams: Although he has little experience working with stone, it was Williams’ vision that led to the MoveOn petition that was signed by thousands of people all over the world. An animator by trade, it seems reasonable to believe that he’ll easily be able to mastermind the granite OutKast addition.
NEXT IN OUR SERIES: HOW TO PAY FOR STANK MOUNTAIN?
In 1958 the mountain was purchased by the State of Georgia. It’s going to be difficult to get cash out of the state so fundraising will have to be done creatively.
Cost
- I assume Mack will need payment for the job in order to pay rent, etc. The word is that he’d be willing to take on the project for a friend-rate ($250K).
- We’ll need ladders and ropes (?) I guess.
- Mack will need something to carve with and he’ll probably need a lot of them because the surface area is huge.
Questions
(A) Does anyone live near Stone Mountain and (B) can Mack stay with you while working on the project?
Is anyone willing to donate sunblock? (Maybe someone with a Costco membership?)
“Sully” calls into The Front Row (680 The Fan/ATL)
Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski is hitting the high seas this summer, hosting the Gronk Party Cruise to the Bahamas.
In this clip I play overly emotional Boston sports fan “Sully” calls into Atlanta’s 680 The Fan (“The Front Row”) to talk about saving up money for the trip and how much it means to him.
Hosts: Steak Shapiro/Chris Dimino/Brian Finneran.
http://www.audiomack.com/embed4/electriccomedycircus/sully-goes-on-the-gronk-cruise
Mark Wahlberg Can’t Even Save Us Now
I have a theory that Mark Wahlberg
thinks that if he does something in a movie, he can do it in real life.
CAN HE?
THIS DOESN’T HELP!!
Mark Wahlberg’s always loved a good rags to riches character.
When he’s not playing the little porn star who could, or the short, long-shot football star who found his way onto the field in the NFL he’s playing a tiny cover-band front-man who gets a chance to join the Actual Band he spent his life mimicking.
In reality he’s a movie star who overcame embarrassing pop culture hash marks like Calvin Klein Undie ads and white-rap anthems to Actually Make It, so I guess his M.O. is pretty fitting.
FILE UNDER: Exhibit A 1.0: “Mark Wahlberg thinks Movies are Life.”
1.
THE CLAIM: Mark Wahlberg could’ve prevented the 9-11 attack on the World Trade Center.
SOURCE: Mark Wahlberg
Maybe it was playing a soldier in Three Kings or a cop in The Departed or The Other Guys? Either way, it looks like Wahlberg may have attended imaginary boot camp.***
Turns out Wahlberg's got an incredible case of High Definition Hindsight.
“In 2012, Wahlberg was quoted in a magazine interview regarding what would have happened if he had flown aboard American Airlines Flight 11 on 9-11-01. He had b€een booked on Flight 11, but his plans changed the day before the scheduled flight and he cancelled his reservation.
Wahlberg received public criticism for stating, “If I was on that plane with my kids, it wouldn’t have went down like it did,” and, “There would have been a lot of blood in that first-class cabin and then me saying, ‘OK, we’re going to land somewhere safely, don’t worry,'” Wahlberg issued a public apology after family members of those killed on the flight expressed outrage for his statements.[69]“
**UPDATE: Theory Confirmed** Mark played a gambler in "The Gambler" and promptly made a $250K bet on the May 2015 Mayweather-Pacquiao with Sean "P.Diddy" Combs. Don't worry - Wahlberg lost.
2.
THE CLAIM: Mark Wahlberg could play professional football.
SOURCE: Mark Wahlberg
-
Mark, next to Atlanta Falcons wide receiver Julio Jones. (Photo is to scale).
After playing an unlikely citizen-turned-football player Wahlberg made a winking claim about being able to play professional football. Based on a true story.
A few years ago Wahlberg showed up on a web series that the Atlanta Falcons’ linebackers put out every week for a season.
“If you need a…[flexes]…strong safety for the game, let me know.”
Later, Deadspin wrote about Wahlberg’s claim, saying it was “Wahlberg doing his Wahlberg thing.”
I hope that the 5′ 8″ (at the most) Wahlberg realizes how ludicrous an idea that is.
Vince Papale, the substitute teacher-turned-Philadelphia Eagle was six-foot-two and a collegiate track star and incredible all-around athlete.
3.
THE CLAIM: Mark Wahlberg could box professionally.
SOURCE: Mark Wahlberg
A few years ago he was “The Fighter” (with Christian Bale).
Guess what?
Our main character was a little boxer that could – this time based on real-life pugilist “Irish” Mickey Ward.
Shortlist asked him, did you begin to think you could’ve been a contender?
“Oh yeah. Even after we shot the movie Micky and Dicky were trying to talk me into going and taking four-rounders against professionals,” Wahlberg said.
Were you tempted?
MW: No, because I have four children and a wife. If it had been six or seven years ago, then sure.
When was your last real-life fight, and did you win?
MW: Mine was a few years ago in a club and I did knuckle-up somebody’s face pretty good. They were deserving of it. Usually when I start something I don’t end up on the winning end, but when I’m doing the right thing, I usually come out pretty good. A guy sucker-punched a friend of mine, so I had to return the favour. Then his friend came in and he got a little, too.
W. Kiser's Electric Comedy Circus 